Trying To Wrap Our Brains Around Palin

Me: Allison posted a pic of her wearing a FUR STOLE. Who wears fur these days? Especially when you're a politician!

Jego: Give her a break . . . she was, after all, mayor of a town that had less people than the building I'm living in.

We Heart Grad School

Mike: I'm going with the one haircut a year approach.

Kate: It's worked so far.

Mike: Saves money for food and commodity costs.

Kate: Mike = recession-proof.

Mike: No job = recession proof.

Kate: YES that means I'M recession-proof too!
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As Good A Reason As Any

Kate: I was thinking about going to China for a while after graduation.

Mike: Ah, that's a good idea. You like being tall.
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If My Life Were a Movie

I never get tired of this game. Friends and I have been known to wile away hours over cocktails discussing which actor would represent which person if all of a sudden our lives were to be turned into a movie with a Hollywood casting call to end all casting calls. So, I present here who would play the people in my life. There's little consistency in my choices--some actors are chosen because of looks, some are chosen because of mannerisms/character. But, click on the name of the actor/celebrity to see a photo if you're curious. Some will be left blank, because this game is far from finished. If anyone has anyone to add, or you think I have assigned you the wrong representative, or you have a better suggestion, please let me know. Also, these are subject to change with no warning.

Mom: Amy Madigan as Annie in Field of Dreams, particularly.
Dad: Harrison Ford because dad always liked Indiana Jones so much and they are now both completely gray.
Dylan: What's Eating Gilbert Grape-era Leonardo DiCaprio
Mitch: Elijah Wood not as Frodo Baggins.
Kathy: the lovely Kirsten Dunst
Kate: Chloe Sevigny--It's her vibe. Or something.
Kristie: Liv Tyler (complete with baby these days)
Amie:
Aaron: Lawrence Fishburne as Morpheus
Terry: Joe Pesci
Jan: Seth Rogen--the funny factor plays a big role here
Travis: Cold Mountain-era Jude Law
Nate: a young Tom Stoppard
Robin: Vanessa Ferlito
Erin: Laura Prepon. The voice. The Jersey. Can't deny it.
Fritzie: Natalie Merchant
Mike Hurley: Michael C. Hall as Dexter
Michael C.:
Justin:
Heather: Maggie Gyllenhaal
Duy: a young, Asian John Cusack. Or so he says.

As for me, I will cast the person I get compared to the most: Uma Thurman (from what I hear, especially in the Tagheuer ads).

Reason Why I Love Kate No. 4,682

Me: Hey!
Kate: Hi, I have a question and I can't seem to do this by myself.
Me (growing worried): Why? What? What's wrong?
Kate: (sighs) I have been searching for the perfect bathrobe. Which has been like a month-long journey so far.
Me: A . . . bathrobe?
Kate: Yes, a bathrobe. And I think I found one but now I can't decide which color to get.
Me: You're telling me the sole reason for this phone call is to help you decide what color bathrobe to buy?
Kate: . . . Yes.

Most Annoying Trivia Competitors Ever

Here's the scene: Trivia night at the Lighthouse in Park Slope. Fritzie, Erin, Eliot and I are in two teams participating in the game. Sitting on the next two bar stools were a man-and-woman team who really could not have been bigger douchebags if they tried. Between shouting in our ears and making ridiculous comments and just being generally douche-y, these two were riding our nerves. However, the following comment proved to be the one to beat.

Fritzie, who is Mexican and fluent in Spanish and French, is arguing a point with the trivia host on a question about a translation of the song "La Cucaracha."

Fritzie: I'm Mexican, and this is the translation I learned growing up.

Woman Douchebag: You're in AMERICA NOW. You're in AMERICA.

Our Humble Abode

Nate's selling a keyboard on Craigslist and a girl came to look at it this evening. She was pleasant and took her time playing the keyboard in the foyer while Nate and I chatted in the kitchen. She talked to Nate for a minute about the instrument and then proceeded to gush about our apartment. Among other things, she said, "I've never seen an apartment this put together in New York." We thought that was cute, and it made us feel even more proud of our very cool apartment.

Politics as Usual

Mike shows me a Web site that is designed to help you choose who you're going to vote for.

Me: it tells me i should vote for kucinich
Me: wasn't expecting that
Me: 95.92%
Mike: uh oh. you better change your mind to start better suiting the band wagon
Me: oh? which bandwagon am i supposedly on?
Mike: knowing you? well. i'd say obama for you....let's see...
Mike: young?
Mike: yes
Mike: female?
Mike: yes
Mike: jewish?
Mike: yes
Mike: NYC?
Mike: yes
Mike: works next to the times? mouth piece of the left?
Mike: yes
Me: lol
Mike: that's an obama supporter.

Nate's Random Pearls of Wisdom

"I feel like in other countries, the only thing that excuses you from being American is being from New York."

Girls

Me: I want to come to Switzerland.

Mario: You can come whenever you want, but it's cold here.

Me: I want cold! I want autumn! I'm sick of this heat.

Mario: You're crazy. As soon as it's cold you will change your mind!

Me: I know, but for now my mind's made up.

Mario: . . . girls.

Tidbits of Conversation

Jan: If I love Death Cab do I have to start wearing makeup?
Me: Mmm maybe just a bit of eyeliner.
Jan: I can do that.

That Travis, He's a Riot!

Me: I'm writing my letter of resignation. Weeeeird.
Travis: E-mail it to Brodeur on accident. Ask him to pass it along to Steve.

I Don't Get It

This is part of an online conversation between me and an ex-boyfriend of mine, John. Sometimes guys just don't get it. Then again, sometimes girls just don't get it either.

me: I gave my number to this guy monday night
John: did he call?
me: and he called me an hour later. an HOUR!! that SCREAMS desperate. so of course I didn't call back
John: lol
me: he left a message. but then he called me again last night! and left a message!
John: oh boy
me: but I haven't checked it yet. dude. can this guy take a class in tried and true dating rules?
John: well.. here's the problem. not all of you women are the same. it's not learning how to date... it's learning how to read women
me: um, the whole knowing-when-to-call thing is very simple
John: you have to figure out if they are the type that wants you to call right away or not
me: like not an hour after you get the number. no girl wants to be called that quickly
John: but..
me: see, there were no words exchanged between me and this guy
John: no words! damn KT
me: no
John: maybe he's intrigued and wants to find out what your VOICE sounds like!
me: um no
John: that's so funny
me: he sounded nice on the message tho
John: maybe he is
me: he's like, you're beautiful blah blah
John: I say give him a chance
me: typical
John: and after 2 conversations, if you don't like him.. then cut it off
me: well whether or not I give him a chance will highly depend on what this second message says. the thing is if we had had a nice conversation and then he called me to say, nice to meet you or whatever, that would be different
John: well yeah... see... here's the thing. if you meet a guy and you're REALLY into him. if he calls you right away, it's all good. but if you're questioning it, then he'd better call you like 3 days later
me: well yeah
John: and us men are forced to read that
me: there's no way to tell if I like this guy or not, we did not exchange a single word.
John: so then why would you drop him right away?
me: because HE CALLED right away
John: But how do you know that it's desperation and not that he's overly excited about YOU.
me: because. regardless of how excited you are, if you have any dating skills whatsoever, you still know to NOT CALL THAT NIGHT!
John: common misconception
me: haven't you been listening?

thoughts? Am I being ridiculous?