Oh the Fun

I happen to keep a record of some hysterical things that are said in my office. Amusing things are said every day (I happen to work with some funny--if painfully sardonic--people), but every now and then a particularly funny line comes out of someone's mouth. Here are the last few that made my Quotes List.

July 5, 2006
“What is this, White Boy Day?”
--David King (staff writer), in response to Ken Lay kicking the bucket and Rush Limbaugh being cleared of illegal Viagra ownership

July 14, 2006
“If Metroland were a musical, this would be the time of the day where the song comes in, “You’re Never Late With a Boss Like That.” (walking in 20 minutes late for a meeting)
--Shawn Stone (arts editor)

July 26, 2006
“Five-year-olds are so stupid.”
--Chet Hardin (news editor)

Aug. 16, 2006
“I’m the fashion editor. I don’t have a lot to do with fashion, but I’m responsible for bringing the style.”
--David King

Sept. 3, 2006
“I’m glad Howard Glassman exists because he makes me feel like an optimist.”
--Shawn Stone

Nov. 29, 2006
“Who the fuck brought the biscotti?”
--Chet Hardin

Jan. 10, 2007
“Beauty and the Geek is multi-layered.”
--Chet Hardin, in defense of his watching the show.

Jan. 23, 2007
“It’s like Lunchables, only hipper.”
--David King, describing his Norwegian Jake’s LunchBoxers

Jan. 30, 2007
“This is the kind of room where if we had a talking stick, we’d beat each other with it.”
--Shawn Stone

Jan. 30, 2007
“Women that tall, I have no problem hitting.”
--David King, making threats about what he’ll do to the Times Union’s (and my best gal) Kate Perry if she steals his story

Despicable Creatures of Evil and Doom

This past Saturday I was in the city for the day--I had some stuff to take care of in the early afternoon, and then I met up with Joe and we went to have sushi for dinner in the village. After dinner, we had a few drinks at a couple different places on Bleecker Street. It was a lovely day, and at around 11 PM, we went to Penn Station to part ways--Joe back to Long Island; me to Morristown, NJ, to stay with my gram for the rest of the weekend.

I missed my 11:11 train for silly reasons I won't get into, so after Joe caught his train, I sat in Penn for an hour doing a NY Press crossword, waiting for the next train.

About a half-hour into my wait, in what seemed like a blink of an eye, hordes of the most vile, destructive, contemptible creatures flooded what had been a moderately empty Penn Station. I'm talking hundreds (maybe even a thousand or two) of the worst lifeform imaginable: teenagers. They were such wretched, unthinkable beings--puking and spitting and drunk and high and crying and screaming into their cell phones and yelling at each other from across the train station. It took about 30 seconds of this nonsense for my nerves to fry.

Not wanting to be run down when trying to get to my train, I kept a close eye on the board, and when the gate was announced, I was among the first to get to the platform and board, even though those little disciples of Satan did their best to plow people over to get to the train. Seats were being taken at lightning speed, so when I spied a woman my age sitting in a two-seater, I asked, "Do you mind?" And she responded, "Are you kidding? I'd rather have you sit here than one of these hooligans," as she gestured at the teens falling over each other to grab seats. Our seats faced the empty space at the front of the train car that's available for people with wheelchairs and whatnot. That space--and every other available space on the train, including the walkways--was filled to the brim with teenagers. Cussing, shouting, know-it-all, drunk, dehydrated, horny, obnoxious, evil teenagers. And to make matters worse, since there were so many of them, it took about 10 to 15 minutes at each stop to let everyone off who needed to get off. What is usually a 45- to 50-minute train ride ended up being more than 2 hours long!

At one point, the woman sitting next to me said, "This is the longest train ride in history." I agreed, and said that I didn't know why it was taking so long. She looked at me and said, "Because we are in hell."

Update: There had been a sold-out performance of O.A.R. at MSG that night, and apparently every teenager in New Jersey had to go see it. Vile creatures.

Pan's Labyrinth

Go see it. Seriously.

This movie is one of the most magical, imaginative, disturbing, riveting, beautiful and heartbreaking movies I've seen.

Should have been nominated for Best Picture, but nevertheless, I'm hoping it will win Best Foreign Language Film.

Lazy Saturday

Today, I . . .

- slept till 11, then got up, slowly
- did 4 loads of laundry
- watched about 8 or 9 episodes of Grey's Anatomy. In a row.
- had cereal, rice and eggs, 4 cups of tea, and ice cream (at separate times)
- talked to my mom, dad, gram, and Kate. and Joe, twice.


Today, I did not . . .

- shower
- go grocery shopping
- do any work
- put make up on
- paint my toenails
- change out of my pajamas
- see anyone besides my roommate(s)
- study
- go to the gym
- leave my house (except to take the dog out once)
- mop, dust, scrub, wipe or sweep anything
- organize my closet
- pay any bills


As you can imagine, today was pretty great.

New Year's Eve, and New Year's Eve . . . Eve

In the two days leading up to the ushering in of the new year, Nate threw a couple of great parties at his house. And, of course, we were there to help celebrate.

Frank and Joe on Dec. 30--New Year's Eve Eve and the day before Frank's birthday.

Nate and his dad Nick during a game we were playing on New Year's Eve. Of course, I forget which game it was.

This is Joe hitting a wall. Cody was nice enough to keep him company on the couch.

Me and Joe.

Tuesday Afternoon in Photos

Here's our news editor, Chet, editing this week's feature, written by the lovely and talented Nicole Klaas. I'm quite certain this burrowing behavior is indicative of what a well . . . written . . . piece . . . it is. . . . . . . . .

. . . hm.